We originally wrote our first No More Tears blog to pair with our No more Tears webinar. The goal of the webinar was to teach parents and caretakers of curly-headed children how to take the pain and struggle out of hair day. We loved how the title worked two ways. No more tears as in children crying throughout the hair process. No more tears as in tearing hair out and damaging it when detangling and styling. Brown Skin Women’s founder, Carmen Veal Conway, was inspired to teach fellow caretakers how to avoid the hair trauma that many of us have faced.
If you have tightly curled hair, it’s likely that your caretakers struggled with your hair. Getting your hair yanked and painfully detangled could have been the norm. There wasn’t a lot of accurate Black hair care information out there, so our parents passed on what their parents knew. Eventually, we began to pass them down to our children. Along her healing journey, Carmen realized that many of her hair insecurities and struggles started as a child. She continued to heal and implement mindful choices into her everyday life. She shortly began recognizing what children need during the cleansing process. And so, No More Tears was born.
We quickly realized that No More Tears encompassed more than just children’s hair care. It extended to the adults seeking to help their children. Children that faced hair trauma during their formative years carry it into adulthood. Adults deserve the same tender, thoughtful approach to taking care of their hair. Children aren’t the only ones who deserve painless styles. We spend time unpacking learned behaviors so our curlfriends can begin healing.
Here’s the roundup of our current No More Tears collection so you can start unpacking and addressing your hair trauma in a healthy way!
1. Heavyhanded with Child’s hair Are You Heavy-Handed with Your Child’s Hair?
“I once had a client who was petrified with every step of the process. The sound of the water made her cry. Her molded ponytail that was left in her hair for weeks took three hours to detangle. Many of us have stories of painful, unpleasant hair experiences. Unfortunately, these experiences happened at home at the hands of our parents.”
2. Back to School with Coily Hair
Your schedule is likely filled with a seemingly never-ending list of things to do as a caretaker. That’s without learning a new hair care regimen for your children. Luckily for you, we here at Brown Skin Women have ample experience taking care of children’s curly hair. Here are some tips on how to manage your little’s hair during the ever-busy school year.
3. How Black Salons Should Service Black Women.
“A salon could be a haven for its patrons. As years went on, salon culture began to change. In the past couple of decades, it’s become commonplace to double-book, have appointments run late, and have an unprofessional stylist. As a result, salons are no longer regarded as a safe haven for many Black women. Instead, it’s something most of us dread or have had to mentally prepare for. How many times have you left the salon feeling exhausted and drained?”
4.Natural Hair Boundaries for Adult
“Adults tend to lack boundaries when they were ignored throughout childhood and their teen years. We learn to deal with discomfort and rationalize it. Being in pain and uncomfortable is simply part of the process. If you’re a woman, this expectation is even larger. We are taught to minimize our pain in order to make others more comfortable.”
5. Salon Tears: A Coily Hair Struggle
“Rough shampooing, a painful blowdry, burns, an unexpected trim, and a style you didn’t ask for. Sound familiar? How many times have you (or someone close to you with coily hair) experienced this or something similar and stayed silent? You probably wanted to spare your hairdresser’s feelings or didn’t want them to get upset with you. You sat, miserable in a chair, knowing that you’d have to mess around with style in hopes of making it work.”